TLDR;
This video provides nine actionable micro habits to retrain your nervous system for those struggling with trauma or anxiety. It emphasizes proactive intention-setting, slowing down, and creating routines that promote safety and regulation. The video also covers the importance of rest, self-awareness, and building resilience to triggers, as well as techniques for managing hypervigilance and winding down in the evening.
- Setting clear intentions
- Slowing down
- Restoring a sense of safety
Intro: When trauma and anxiety keep your nervous system dysregulated [0:00]
Trauma and anxiety can cause the nervous system to become overly sensitive, leading to chronic stress, hypervigilance, anger, and fear. This can result in feeling triggered, tense, and exhausted. Trauma often leads to a sympathetically dominant state, which is the activated, anxious state of the nervous system. While this state is normal for brief periods, chronic activation can negatively impact mental and physical health. The good news is that the nervous system can be retrained to be parasympathetically dominant, which is the calming state where one feels safe, balanced, and confident.
Daily habits for trauma and anxiety [1:10]
The video introduces nine micro habits that can be incorporated into daily life to retrain the nervous system for better regulation. These habits aim to shift the nervous system from a state of chronic stress and hypervigilance to a state of calm and safety.
1. Be proactive and set clear intentions [1:24]
Instead of trying to suppress feelings of stress, it's more effective to proactively set intentions for the day. The regulating habit involves choosing something you will do, rather than focusing on what you want to avoid. Setting actionable intentions provides a sense of control and forward momentum. For example, instead of saying "I don't want to feel stressed," set an intention like "I will be kind to myself today" or "I will pause when I feel overwhelmed." Writing down or visualizing this intention for a minute each morning can help create a clear vision for the day.
2. Slow down instead of speed up [2:52]
When disregulated, people often feel rushed and scattered, moving in frantic, jerky ways, which signals danger to the brain. A simple way to calm the nervous system is to slow down and move deliberately. Slowing down sends a message of safety and helps regulate the nervous system. This can be achieved by creating pause routines and building mini habits into transitions, such as taking three slow breaths before a meeting or checking in with your body before eating. Training yourself to walk, eat, and respond more slowly can also be beneficial.
3. Set the tone for the day [3:59]
How you start your day can significantly impact your nervous system. Starting the day with a blaring alarm, worrying in bed, or immediately checking news or social media can prime your nervous system to feel in danger. Instead, set a healthy tone by giving yourself enough time in the morning. Practices like meditation, prayer, or reading (not the news) can be helpful. Other beneficial habits include exercise, a lower-carb breakfast, and reducing or eliminating caffeine. If you feel low energy, gently stimulate your nervous system with happy music, something funny, or a hot shower.
4. Schedule time to rest [5:38]
Instead of filling every moment with activity, schedule time throughout the day to rest, recover, regulate, and check in. Research suggests that we function best when 10% of the day is set aside for rest, which is 2.4 hours. This can be achieved by incorporating activities like morning meditation, lunchtime walks, or winding down with a show before bed. Slowing down during meals and reducing screen time can also contribute to better regulation.
5. Check in with yourself [7:13]
Instead of disconnecting from yourself, make nervous system regulation a regular habit. Setting a gentle chime on your phone as a reminder to pause and check in with yourself can be effective. Notice physical sensations, posture, breathing, and emotional state. Gently name the state you're in without judgment, such as "I feel shut down," "I feel anxious," or "I feel calm." Also, check in with your needs: Are you thirsty, hungry, or in need of rest? Meeting basic needs supports nervous system regulation. After checking in, slowly and gently soften and slow down.
6. Counteract hypervigilance by restoring your sense of safety [8:40]
Instead of constantly scanning for danger due to hypervigilance, remind yourself that you are safe and can trust yourself to get through it. Practice orienting to safety by gently turning your head and looking around your space to ground yourself in the present moment. Name three things you can see, hear, and feel to anchor your nervous system. Carrying an anchor object or using a healing affirmation like "I am safe enough right now" can also condition your nervous system to remember that you are safe.
7. Build skills to bounce back from triggers [9:48]
Develop a plan for when you get triggered, rather than engaging in addictive, avoidant, or reactive behaviors. This plan might include sensory activities, processing techniques, and ways to re-engage your sense of safety. Sensory activities could involve sipping ice water or washing your face. Processing techniques could include journaling or talking it out with a friend or therapist. To restore your sense of safety, use reminders or mantras like "Here in this moment, I'm safe" or "I can trust myself to feel my feelings and be okay." Seeking social support, such as calling a safe person or spending time with a pet, can also be a powerful regulator.
8. Expand your window of tolerance [12:20]
Instead of being frozen or stuck in an overwhelmed state, move your body to expand your window of tolerance. If you tend to be dominated by the dorsal vagal response (shutdown state), upregulate through movement and activities that stretch your nervous system. Incorporate slightly stressful activities that lead to laughter and play. If you tend to be dominated by stress and tension, incorporate more play into your day. This could involve playing sports, playing with your kids, or doing something funny that makes you laugh. Adding discomfort through exercise, fasting (with physician approval), or cold water exposure can also expand your nervous system's ability to tolerate stress.
9. Intentionally wind down in the evening [14:00]
Instead of engaging in avoidance behaviors like scrolling through your phone, create an intentional evening wind-down routine. Reflect on your day through journaling or voice notes, noting what felt good, what was hard, and what helped you cope. Practice a somatic release ritual by gently tapping or rubbing your arms and legs, or lie on the floor and breathe deeply to discharge stress. Practice gratitude by naming three small things that brought comfort or peace. Other helpful exercises include progressive muscle relaxation and safe place visualization.
Healing trauma and anxiety one daily habit at a time [15:37]
Incorporate these nine micro habits into your daily routine to regulate your nervous system if you have trauma or anxiety. Start with one disruptive behavior and replace it first. Begin with small changes and practice them for a few weeks until they become habits before incorporating another new habit.
